Up, up, and away!!!

Well, an hour and a half before I must leave for the airport. I promise I'll take thousands of pictures and post them all on my blog.

Over my dead body.

I'll post SOME pictures though, I don't wanna waste my already boring life on constantly uploading pictures and posting them. It would take YEARS. My friend said if I met any hot guys to not be shy and talk to them, but what if they don't speak English? I can see a big problem already.......

I'm also afraid that I'm gonna accidentally eat something with nuts in it and die. I'm severely allergic to nuts. Especially peanut butter. A strangely common thing for people to be allergic to now-a-days.

AND.....

I'll be spending time with my parents. Yuck. Gross. Parent-child bonding scares the living crap out of me. Ughhhhh... -shudders- Loving my parents is physically and mentally impossible for me.

And if things don't go well................

.........................................

Amber, you get my cds, my ipod, and my cd player. You can have my computer as well, it hates me anyway. Take my guitar too, if you want. Oh, and the tickets for the concert, all yours. Just make sure you have fun and talk to Gerard for me.

All my anime stuff goes to Hannah, I know she'll want it.

My drawings......I don't care who takes them, just don't throw them away or burn them. I may not like them all, but I put EFFORT into drawing them. And I'll admit that I'm pretty good at drawing for my age. I'M NOT BRAGGING!

My books, just give them to good will, along with the rest of the stuff I don't care about. NO THROWING OR GIVING AWAY MY MANGA. That goes to Hannah, cuz it's considered anime.

And, invite Gerard to my funereal. Just do it. Please. My request.

......................................

No I'm not dying, I was just writing that in case something bad happens to me. Not that I gurentee anything WILL or WILL NOT happen to me. Whatever, I'll see you later, maybe in a month if I'm still alive. Just kidding! Bye I'm off to party my way through Europe!


So long and farewell, take care of yourselves for the next month my good people.

Cheese Puffs! and alot of sarcasm.....

~The following post has nothing to do what-so-ever about cheese puffs or anything cheesy or puffy in that matter, if I don't get to off topic, the title was just created to attract attention because now-a-days it seems that people like cheesy and puffy things ((but it there is alot of sarcasm, I changed the title after I read through this several times)~

Okay. Here I am, sitting in my room, the only sounds are the sounds of the fan, and my crappy and neglected computer running against its own will. And maybe I'm also talking to myself -no doubt that I am- since it seems to happen so often in my case. Oh, and I forgot to mention the bead curtain on the side of the room that's now reflecting the light off of it's turquoise colored beads, which is annoying the hell out of me. I'd go on describing every single detail of my room, but unlike some other people, I have a life. Kinda.

Tomorrow is the day when the ship sets off on it's Madden voyage! No, not really, I just wanted to say something that sounded interesting, BUT I am leaving for Europe tomorrow (which will soon be today in fifteen minutes my time), so I say goodbye to my blog, America, all the creepy people I've talked to online (-snort- Just kidding!), and all my friends, and especially the broken hearted friend I am leaving when I go to Europe (yeah, I'm talking to YOU Amber. Thank you SO much for calling me back. Of course I'm being sarcastic, but it's SO hard to express sarcasm through text. And by the way, that last sentence about sarcasm wasn't meant to be sarcastic. For any of you who might have thought that by the way I capitalized 'so').

I feel kind of afraid of flying. Since the last time I've ever flown was when I was three on my way to Sandi ago, California. But, I shall have Gerard! (what I named my ipod), and he will be my comfort through out the flight. Soothing me with his depressing lyrics but yet beautiful songs. (I'm referring to My Chemical Romance if you people who haven't been out in a million years were wondering. And if you still are confused, MCR is a band and you deserved to be whacked upside the head, dumb***t). Yeah, I'm being mean, I know, but I'm cracking up at my crappy jokes all the same, and if your stupid enough, you probably are too. Haha, we all know I should be a comedian, it'll get me out of the house and away from my insane mother. (I was being SARCASTIC there.)

But yeah, I'm bored, tired, and thirsty, and I want to go to bed and dream about a guy that I made up in my mind that looks like Gerard Way but his name is Eric and he's not thirty. He's in college, though, still making him alot older than me. What's me with older men? My god. Maybe it's because older men have BRAINS.....

An online blog isn't enough

I think I should start writing a journal of my life. Or typing one at least (since I suck at writing, and can type about 50+ words per minute. You probably could to, if you did so much online chatting for the past two years), but the problem with typing is that I won't always be near a computer. Maybe I should start a scrapbook then. I have a lot of pictures from previous school years, and outdoor education camp (something the 5th and 6th graders go to some time in late Febuary), and it would be nice to have some memories to hold onto when I go to highschool.

I have one more year of middle school.

I hate admitting it, I'm not very old otherwise. But still, the people I've gone to school with are people I've know for eight to nine years, and it will be extremely hard to part with them. Some of them will be going to the same high school as me, depending on whether or not that school will let me in. That's another problem. The high school I want to go to has a limited amount of openings, and if I don't end up going to that one, then I'll end up going to some all-girl school, which in my case, would be complete torture.

But back on subject, I've decided to go through some of my things, and give some of it away, since I always end up convincing myself that I have to much, and that I need to give some of it away to people who need and desire it more than I do. I came across a few envelopes of pictures from previous years of middle and elementary school, and ended up going through them. It brought back a lot of unforgettable memories. I will always hold them in my heart. Even when I leave that school, like the 8th graders did this year, I will look be able to look back and smile to myself as I remember the good times I've had.

BUT.......

There is one more year left. One more year with my best friend (IF she comes back to my school, if she doesn't I'll make sure I strangle her). One more year to make memories at the school I've gone to since I was five.

I promise I'll make it the best year of my life. ☺

Youth Of The Nation

Last day of the rest of my life

I wish I would've known

Cause I didn't kiss my mama goodbye

I didn't tell her that I loved her and how much I care

Or thank my pops for all the talks

And all the wisdom he shared

Unaware, I just did what I always do

Everyday, the same routine Before I skate off to school

But who knew that this day wasn't like the rest Instead of taking a test

I took two to the chest

Call me blind, but I didn't see it coming

Everybody was running But I couldn't hear nothing

Except gun blasts, it happened so fast

I don't really know this kid

Even though I sit by him in class

Maybe this kid was reaching out for love

Or maybe for a moment

He forgot who he was

Or maybe this kid just wanted to be hugged

Whatever it was I know it's because

[chorus:]We are, We are, the youth of the nation

Little Suzy, she was only twelve

She was given the world

With every chance to excel

Hang with the boys and hear the stories they tell

She might act kind of proud

But no respect for herself

She finds love in all the wrong places

The same situations

Just different faces

Changed up her pace since her daddy left her

Too bad he never told her

She deserved much better

Johnny boy always played the fool

He broke all the rules

So you would think he was cool

He was never really one of the guys

No matter how hard he tried

Often thought of suicide

It's kind of hard when you ain't got no friends

He put his life to an end

They might remember him then

You cross the line and there's no turning back

Told the world how he felt

With the sound of a gat

[chorus]

Who's to blame for the lives that tragedies claim

No matter what you say

It don't take away the pain

That I feel inside, I'm tired of all the lies

Don't nobody know why It's the blind leading the blind

I guess that's the way the story goes

Will it ever make sense

Somebody's got to know

There's got to be more to life than this

There's got to be more to everything I thought exists

[chorus]

(By P.O.D.)

You look so much like.....

Wow. I find it very annoying when someone says this. You'll just be walking into school, or into a store, or somewhere like that, when SUDDENLY some random person comes up to you and says: "You remind me so much of so-and-so. You and so-and-so have the same colored eye and you both have the same face and....."

NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! I hate it! God dammit, I don't wanna look like someone else! I want to be a freakin' individual! I don't want to look the same as 'so-and-so', I want to be myself, all the time, have my OWN personality, have my OWN face, my OWN habits, my OWN physical features, I don't want to be compared to ANYONE, and for the love of Christ, why the HELL does my mother NOT knock on the damn door!? Why does she just walk in when I don't want to be interrupted, and start blabbing on about her screwed up life, or telling me to get the damn lights off, or clean my damn room, or get my *insert bad word* off of the computer!

Now that I've settled down a bit, I have decided that I'm going to put up a motion detector and alarm system on my door so I know when my parents walk in. And maybe lasers, so they get zapped too. Or I'll booby trap it, and have this DNA detector thing so that it doesn't go off when I walk past the door.

Well, that didn't have anything to do what-so-ever with the topic, and I'm getting bored, so I'm gonna spell check this and then post it.

Probably the shortest post I ever make....

How do ya like the header? I like it a lot actually, it's a picture of Inuyasha, a stubborn yet brave half demon. I like his personality, spunky, brave, and confident, but totally clueless at the same time. I also thought that my blog title would go along with it, since 'who gives a crap anyway?' Sounds exactly like our rebellious Inuyasha would say. He's a great role model, despite his bad language and rudeness, and maybe that he's only an anime character who doesn't exist.

I'm really mad at the world

I am! This place is insane! I can't believe humans! There so messed up! I feel like doing something, about the war in Iraq, about global warming, about world hunger and poverty, but what can I do? It feels like a clock is ticking, not just for me, but for the whole world, and on that clock is all the time we have left. Whether it be years or months or weeks or days or hours or minutes or even seconds, I don't know, no one can possibly know or figure out. The human mind can't penetrate something like that. It's impossible. Or is it? So much to be learned, so much to be gained, so much more than there already is. It's a strange world. I begin to wonder who put us here? More importantly, why? Why is there an Earth, or an Universe? People believe that us coming to be is by coincidence, but how is it possible? How could the Universe, the world, and everyting we know, the amazing human mind, and this perfect world have come about in a blink of an eye? Everything is so complex, it's almost impossible for anything such as that to happen.

Another thing that ticks me off is how people abuse the world we live in. It's a perfect place! What more could you ask for?! Our world is unique, it has everything a person could ever need on it, it's just unbelievable how people can just abuse it like they do everyday. There is no world like our world, we should respect and protect it, or pay the price.

A half a day before they let me out.....

Yes finally, a half a day before they let me free. Free to be the weird person I am anytime I want without the worry of homework and projects and other things that involve mental activity. I don't like to think. My brain clicks in on and off, it does its own things whenever it wants to. Quite irritating really. Right now I think it's half-on and half-off. I don't feel to smart right now....

After this is over, I get to pay a visit to all of the people on the eastern side of the world. I'm happy I'm going there, not happy I'm going there for a month with my parents. Cut off from all communication, unable to talk to any of my friends in America, surrounded by a ton of people who don't speak English or even care about Americans anyway. It's like a super creative way to be grounded. And expensive, too. But my parents HAD to drag me along, since everyone refused to take me in. I don't blame those people. I would avoid myself too if I could. Or maybe I wouldn't. I can have a reasonably interesting conversation with myself sometimes.

Anyway, I leave next Friday (June 15th), and won't be back until July 15th. By then I'll already have had my birthday. To bad I won't be in America, I'll miss out on the free slurpee's they'll hand out at 7/11, unless they have 7/11s in Europe.....

Once Upon A Time.....

Once upon a time I had a my very own blog, and it was so long ago that I forgot my user name and password and could never log in again. Let's not hope that that happens again, shall we?

But I am very proud to announce that today, yes this very day, was (IS if it's still June 5th), the day I created this blog. I can here the applause. (*clap* *clap* *clap*) Yes, I can see the happiness BURNING in your eyes. I can hear people screaming in rejoice, praising the stars and crying tears of gladness. I watch them as they leap up and down yelling 'Hallelujah', waving their arms madly, smacking the poor souls next to them in the face, spreading the joy of histaria and bloody noses.

Back to reality. Here I am sitting in my room, supposivley doing some report, but delaying by starting my own blog so I can write and record my pointless and completely random thoughts and making myself seem highly educated by writing big words that not even I know the meaning to (and to my amazment, I spelled them all right!) Wow. I need to get out more often. Instead I spend so much time in my room like some emotionally challenge freak who's afraid to go out in the world but instead locks themselves in their room and makes friends with random predators on the internet. It sure is the life. But then again, I REALLY need to do that report, but my computer has turned high speed internet against me by blocking uninappropriate websites, giving me stupid popups, and taking forever to load a single webpage. Thank God I don't have dial-up. That would be the death of me. I better post this before I decide to kick this computer and watch it shut down.